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Have you ever had relationship problems?

  • Posted on January 20, 2014 at 5:41 am

Have you ever had relationship problems? We all have them one time or another big time or small time.

Relationship problems are another type of “stress” we all experience from time to time. Conflicts can arise with our spouse, parents, children, friends, co-workers, employees, bosses, or even with total strangers.

As common as our relationship problems are, we often misunderstand what causes them to occur. Much of the time they come from hidden conversations and action patterns within us, not from the behavior or attitude of others. The problem is we often don’t notice the role that we play.

Well today, I received a forward in my inbox which story I would like to share here. In as much as it sounds humorous and makes you laugh as soon as you finish reading it, when you think more deeply about it on a subtler level, then it illustrates the point above that I just mentioned about stressful relationships.

Efforts to treat a deaf wife

A man feared his wife wasn’t hearing as well as she used to and he thought she might need a hearing aid. Not quite sure how to approach her, he called the family Doctor to discuss the problem. The Doctor told him there is a simple informal test the husband could perform to give the Doctor a better idea about her hearing loss.
Here’s what you do,” said the Doctor, “stand about 40 feet away from her, and in a normal conversational speaking tone see if she hears you. If not, go to 30 feet, then 20 feet, and so on until you get a response.”

  That evening, the wife is in the kitchen cooking dinner, and he was in the den. He says to himself, “I’m about 40 feet away, let’s see what happens.” Then in a normal tone he asks, ‘Honey, what’s for dinner?” No response.

So the husband moves to closer to the kitchen, about 30 feet from his wife and repeats, “Honey, what’s for dinner?” Still no response.

Next he moves into the dining room where he is about 20 feet from his wife and asks, Honey, what’s for dinner?”
Again he gets no response so, He walks up to the kitchen door, about 10 feet away. “Honey, what’s for dinner?” Again there is no response. He feels confident that his wife is deaf, having serious loss of hearing.

So he walks right up behind her. “Honey, what’s for dinner?”

“James, for the FIFTH time I’ve said, CHICKEN!”

I had a hearty laugh when I read this story but then again, sometimes we are too quick to think that our relationship problem lies entirely in the other person. It would do us good to do some introspection before we criticize others. Often we reflect our own lack when we criticize others and we admire those attributes in others that we lack.